RSS

God's Weirdest Creations

Man is said to be the most intelligent of all the animals, and without a doubt the weirdest too.Yes, even weirder than dogs, which smell each others you know what! Weirdness can either be innate or acquired. Some lucky people are born insane, and the others acquire it, since insanity very much like laughter is contagious. Observing human behavior is my favourite hobby/obsession/interest, so this post is dedicated to God's Weirdest Creation-Man. (but for all you atheists out there, let's just call them freaks of nature.)

Teenagers: They get into trouble, fall prey to peer pressure, easily mistake infatuation for love, get pimples and freak out for the littlest of things. There isn't really a better way to describe teenagers. Here's a glimpse of the teenagers today:

Smoka and I, while texting each other;
Smoka: OMG! Guess which song I was just humming?
Me: Hannah Montana?
Smoka: Worse! Taylor Swift-Love Story! I bet I have a twin sister and she was humming that song! That's the only logical explanation...
Me: Lol. Your twin sister IS Taylor Swift! Have you seen her hair?!
Smoka: *gasps for air* I have to go listen to Iron Maiden right now! This can't be happening to me! *switches on the comp' listens to Iron Maiden, heaves a sigh of relief* I almost died!
Me: *looks at the ridiculous message* : |*doesn't know how to react to her cousin's frivolous over-reaction*

You would know that a guy is gay when he asks for lotion and then complains that he can't find the lip balm. But some guys are bipolar to such an extent that they have the audacity to ask for a lap dance, even after the whole lip balm incident. And a few other guys needn't be talked about, their coconut hair and their stoic nature does the talking for them.

There are a few others who are hilariously weird without making an effort. For example:
Smoka: What's the formula for compound interest?
Das: Dude, I don't know chemistry that well!

Weird People with even weirder lingos: Lingo's are just a weird way of expressing individuality. Lingos are unique to one's existence. Some people are unaware about the existence of punctuation marks, some are expressionless,i.e, don't know how to use smileys, and others are just plain funky! Different people have different ways of saying 'What's up?'; Wassup? Waddup? So sup? Wat u doin? Mel yen idhe? And the funkiest I've seen so far is "Wassa?"

Parents: Sometimes overprotective, sometimes supportive, sometimes ridiculously 'encouraging' us towards Independence, sometimes abnormally generous. Have you ever seen anyone as fickle minded and yet so firm in their decisions, as parents?

Drunkards: This category was created especially for Ram Kumar, whom I recently saw for the very first time. He was talking to a tree...'nough said.

Soap-stars: Or you can call them, wanna-be-film-stars, so desperate for publicity and popularity that they are willing to make-out or break-up with their partners only in the presence of a camera. Of course, the maker of the soap operas is the mother of all weirdos-Ekta Kapoor! Rakhi Sawant, who was dieing for a husband with such desperation that she held her own Swayamwar, is not far behind. Wasn't anyone normal willing to marry her that she was ready to marry any Tom, Dick or Harry, who was willing to. Don't you pity the fool who married her?

Geeks and Geniuses: Quote Sheldon: I wouldn't love my son the same if he didn't know whether to differentiate or integrate to find the area under a curve!
I had this geeky intelligent classmate, who fell on his head while trying to catch the ball while playing cricket. After sometime, a kid came up to him and asked him who the second president of India was. He couldn't quite place a finger on the answer, so he freaked out so much and starting weeping claiming that the fall had made him lose his intelligence, and started to blame his poor fielding techniques. Only when none of us could answer the little kid's question, was he convinced that he was in fact normal before and after the "accident". Intelligent huh?

People 'round the world are weird in their own, unique way, that's what makes psychiatry so fascinating. And coming from me, insanity is not a insult but a compliment.

The Ostrich Moment

Have you ever said or done something, or been at the wrong place at the wrong time that you regret it for the rest of your life...Been mortified to such an extent that you wish you could bury your head in the ground to save yourself from the embarrassment?Well, who hasn't? And it's painfully humiliating when your friends or relatives keep reminding of the same and point and laugh at you until you wish you could die out of embarrassment. Such moments are hell funny when you're on the other side of the finger, otherwise, it just makes you want to give them the finger.Here's a list of of the most embarrassing moments a.k.a ostrich moments, which I've experienced or been told about(you may choose to empathise or just point and lol)
  • Smoka, during her freshman year at college, in a desperate attempt to make new friends; when asked about her day and her classmates, she says to her bus-mate, "My class is full of nerds. Everyone, below 100 rank in CET. I mean who gets that?!" When the girl gets off the bus, Smoka's classmate says to her, "What did you just say to her? Do you know what her rank is?160!"
  • Vin, sitting in a noisy class, earphones on, singing to himself; all of a sudden, everyone falls silent just when he's hitting a high note and his voice sounds squeakier than a mouse. If it was someone else in Vin's place they would never again sing another song in public.
  • At a gift shop, buying a birthday gift, being a good friend; I find a Mungaru Male VCD. on the rack and my thoughtfulness resurfaces and I say to Smoka, "I know you want this. Let me buy it for you." Smoka just rolls her eyes and walks away without even considering it. The sound of my heart breaking was camouflaged by a tap-tap-tapaar noise of the CDs, as they fell one after the other onto the floor in a cascade fashion, when all I could do was stand there and give an OMG-WTF-have-I-done-expression. Trust me when I say, "The tap-tap-tapaar noises continue to haunt me in my nightmares."
  • SN at a mall with her parents(as if that isn't embarrassing enough! But, wait! There's more!), her parents ask her to get a shopping basket and when she does she realises that there are a million pairs of eyes staring at her, giving her a what-are-you-upto-look. She is almost paralysed out of embarrassment when she realises that she had in fact picked up the basket meant for wine shopping.
  • At Sanc's place, trying to study for a Physics test, when my phone rings; It's an unknown number, I just say "hello. who's this?" And the guy on the other side says "Hi! This is Rajesh." Realising that it must be a jobless loafer making prank calls to random numbers, I just say "OK" and cut the call. Till date, Sanc gets keyed up, upon hearing the name 'Rajesh' and doesn't stop laughing until either one of us chokes.
  • NM in an airport at Bahrain, is taken to the business class lounge by her "caretaker", and she is loving it as it has a mini-arcade and a browsing center and she has it all to herself. She gets a call from her parents on her cell phone, she exclaims to them, "The business class is awesome! It has this amazing arcade and everything! I love it!" When she comes out, she finds that people are smirking at her. NM dear, the business class may be amazingly awesome but it is slightly flawed. The arcade isn't sound proof.
Things to do today:
1.Get up
2.Survive
3.Go back to bed.
 
Copyright 2009 Incurable Insanity All rights reserved.
Blogger Templates created by Deluxe Templates
Wordpress Theme by EZwpthemes